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Mamma watches as Tessa "plays" with the neighbor boys. She is tying them up...with her jump rope. They are obediently submitting to her commands. Mamma considers putting a stop to this "game" but then realizes [sigh] it's probably too late.

Mamma and Tessa are sitting in a fast food restaurant when an elderly gentleman scoots by with his walker. Tessa jumps up on her seat, points and exciedly screams loud enough for any hearing-impared person to comprehend, "LOOK! HE'S OLD JUST LIKE GRANDMA'S DEAD BROTHER!"

A Year in the Life of a Three Year Old

It all started a year ago...

Click to view the full comic strip.

HAPPY 4th BIRTHDAY TESSA!

Mamma doesn't buy sweets, soda being one of them but today is a special day and those cute little half cans are too adorable to pass up. Perfect for a pre-schooler's birthday party. "SODA!!! YEAH!!!" the kids all exclaim as it is presented to them. Eagerly they open their cans and take their first swig. Then it starts...ironincally with the most enthused of the group...

In a I'm-about-to-have-a-meltdown-wail, "I don't LIKE soda! I WA-ANT milk!!!"

Tessa chimes in..."Yeah! MII-IILK!" as she pushes her soda can away from her.

A Hairy Situation

Tessa accompanies Mamma to the county court house so that we can get baby Vanessa's adoption papers signed. Tessa is told to sit quietly as the woman at the probate office verifies Mamma's information. Tessa asks the clerk, "Are you a boy or a girl?"

"A girl," the mature woman answers.

Pointing to her own upper lip Tessa asks, "Then why do you have hair right here?"

Note: The clerk is still allowing the adoption to proceed. Baby Vanessa is officially Tessa's at 11:30 AM on September 13th.

Renaissance Bosoms

Tessa walks up to the woman in costume, "Can I touch dat?"

The woman bends over to greet little Tessa offering her necklace for inspection.

"No, dat!"

The woman holds out her other necklace to Tessa.

"NO! DAT!" Tessa says as she pokes her fluffed breast. "What is dat?"

The woman blushes. "You know what that is."

"DATS YOUR BOOOB!" Tessa yells as she runs back to Mamma...who is also blushing.

Love

"He's DEAD and I love him!" Tessa exclaims as she shows Mamma the curled up slug in her hand.

Upcoming Birthday

Mamma and Tessa are discussing what Tessa wants to do for her upcoming birtday. "I want a pirhanna?"

"A what?"

"A pirhanna!"

"Do you even know what that is?"

"Yeah, you put candy in it," she puts her hands together as if swinging an invisible bat, "and hit is like this."

"A piñata?"

"Yeah, a pirhanna."

Tessa's First Wedding

Mamma tries to explain what a wedding is as she and Tessa wait for the bride to appear, when Tessa blurts out, "I'm going to marry Timmy!"

At the wedding dance Tessa watches from the edge of the dance floor as the bride and groom dance together. She motions Mamma over, "Mamma. Are YOU going to dance wit' a boy?"

"Probably not. You?"

"No way!"

Tessa listens intently as Mamma explains what's going on during the ceremony. She silently watches the bride and groom and then turns to ask, "So they have to share ALL their toys now?"

Sincere Apology

"Mamma, sorry I called you old poopyhead."

[pause]

"I mean, you ARE OLD but you're not a poopyhead."

[pause]

"Old.."

"Tessa. You should stop now."