Mamma is getting food from the buffet at a local Chinese restaurant. From across the restaurant Tessa can heard screaming over and over, "I FARTED! HEY TIMMY! I FARTED!"

A Face Only A Mother Could Love

Mamma and Tessa are sitting at the kitchen table eating grapes.

"Look mama, a face. Two eyes and two noses."

"Two noses?"

Pointing to her nostrils she counts, "one..two."

The Blame Game

Mama pulls a pile of pillow stuffing out from behind the oversized chair.

"Tessa. Did you do this?"

"No. Vanessa did."

Note: Vanessa is three months old....she just discovered she has HANDS though she's not sure what to do with them yet.

3:30 AM
"Mama."
"Mama."
"I'm thirsty."

3:45 AM
Tessa crawls into bed with a full glass of water she got for herself.
Mama kicks her out and sends her to her own bed.

4:00 AM
Tessa crawls into bed with mama.

4:01 AM
Tessa pukes water and French fries all over mama, mama's bed, mama's bedroom floor, mama's bathroom floor, mama's bathroom walls...

"Mama! Mama! Katie took me to McDonalds had a farm!"

Come into my heart...

Tessa is praying before bed with her hand on her throat. "Thank you Jesus in my heart."

Mama moves Tessa's hand. "This is your heart."

Tessa looks at mama in disbelief. "Dat's my boob!"